i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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