maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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