if only i could text you this smell
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
