I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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