I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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