somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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