If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
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