I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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