can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
