Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
