He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize