I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
you traded sex for a burrito?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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