She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I got inside last night via doggy door
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
