Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize