I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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