oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
