Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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