Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
