I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
