I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
