She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
