she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
