If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
