At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
