after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I think we might need a safe word for this...
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
