Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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