I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize