dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Randomize
