But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
