brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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