her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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