You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize