his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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