Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
