i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
