I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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