haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize