dude i'm inner monologue high
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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