you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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