How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize