That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize