another moral hangover. fuck.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
