You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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