I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
