why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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