True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
