i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm at about main and main street
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
