I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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