I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
