If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize